I recently refused a contract for continued work at a small private university. As a person with an advanced degree in the arts, this seems like a ludicrous tactic. After all, I know many a fellow classmate who would be grateful for the contract and a chance to work inside the walls of academia. I was too, grateful that is, but I was also exhausted.
I came to teach writing at the college level because I loved to write, but in the pursuit of a full time job, I overbooked myself and did not write. In order to advance as an university level writing professor, I must publish as well as teach. In order to publish, I need to write. In order to write, I need to teach less. In order to teach less, I need to make more money in another way, or I need to live more frugally. This meant cutting out the $400/month fuel bill and the 2 1/2 hour commute on days I taught at the university. As such, I've had to rearrange the structure of my life and my family (thank you, Tracy and Shea).
Without getting into all the details, I will simply say this, "It's time to live a rich, poor life." In the coming months, it is my hope to reconnect and reground myself into my own home, my own family, and my own creative practice. I'm stepping off the hamster wheel and actively working on engaging with those people and those activities I love the most. In doing so, I'm hoping to ignite the creative spark that brings me back to the page.
My quest over the summer and in the coming months is to find ways to spend quality time with my family in a way that is both cost-conscious and engaged. No more late nights grading papers while my family sleeps. I'm looking forward to swimming with my daughter, hiking with my wife, competing in a duathalon with my brother, camping with friends, and rediscovering my time and my energy when I'm not dedicating it to all things work.
I'll be using my blog to update folks on my results, but I'm not going to put myself on a schedule of posting like I've tried to do in the past. I'm being forgiving of myself as I court and woo myself back into the writing practice. This is a loving reconciliation, not a stressful new commitment. I hope the experiment yields results.
