ARGH!

So it has been a number of days since I have posted here and I'm beginning to see my blog as an outlet for my various emotional overflows. I am fighting white space everywhere but here as I fill line after line with the crap rantings of a person too lazy to do the work.

I had the opportunity to work on my writing for a couple of hours last night and I pretty much did everything in my power to do anything but. I am not doing the work and the longer I prolong this phobia of the blank page, the more it grips me. I need to sit my butt in the seat and get to work but I can't seem to orient myself enough to even accomplish that!!!

How am I supposed to write if I won't even look at the screen. I have been filling my time with reading which, I guess, some would call filling the hopper, but I call evasion when it gets to this point. I have discovered some pretty interesting books of short stories in my evasion. The first is called Brief Encounters with Che Guevera by Ben Fountain and The Coast of Good Intentions by Michael Byers. Both are stunning examples of what threading one word with another can do and the power it unleashes. They are two very different storytellers but each person seems to capture the essence of place and character very well. I want to do the same. I want my words to have power and I'm just not sure how I can accomplish that when I am sabotaging myself at every given turn.

ARGH!!!