Photo of Joe and I playing reporters at the Cutsforth's house circa 1984.
Joe is one of the best friends I had in childhood. He lived down the street from me, just past the hazelnut orchards, a short bike ride away, and much of my childhood was spent over at his house, at his parents' pharmacy, or riding our bikes around town. He was a spectacular kid, one of those kids with power and composure that went beyond his years. He always impressed me, and I often tried to emulate him and his behavior.
As children, Joe and I were always coming up with new ideas for games to play, businesses to start, shows to put on, and adventures to create. His imagination was a wonderful thing. I remember imagining scenarios to engage in, say a game show, but it was always Joe who found a way to put it into action, who came up with the detail that launched the thing in new and exciting ways. His mind was sharp and quick, as was his sense of humor.
Greer Smith's going away party at the Peterson's 1984
People found Joe impossible to resist. Adults and children alike found him engaging. When we were in Junior High, Joe, Chris Etzel, and I started Action at Ackerman a "news" show on local access television that kept the community informed about events at the junior high school. This was Joe's brainchild, and he filled the role of lead anchor. While I believe it was Harry Lee Kwai, the head of the local channel at the time, who came up with the idea and recruited us kids to participate, it was Joe who ran with the project.
It wasn't long before Joe designed a logo, professionally printed business cards for all of us, and solicited a fair amount of money from sponsors. I remember traipsing into local businesses as a 12-year-old, Joe by my side, and asking for the owner. Joe dressed the part too. Dressed in a suit jacket and tie, he always played the consummate professional. By the time we left these businesses, owners had cut us a check. We bought a lot of soda pop and candy with that money while we edited our show.
Photo taken circa 1987 before Jen Shelstad's surprise party.
There was another side to our friendship though. No matter how good of friends Joe and I were, we were also competitors. I can't say for sure that he felt the competition the same way I did, but I competed with Joe. We wanted a lot of the same things. Both of us were ambitious boys. We wanted good grades, to play sports, to excel in clubs, and, once, even the same student council position. In middle school, Joe and I ran against each other for the office of President. Joe inevitably won that position, and I was hurt, but I couldn't deny that he'd earned it. As with most things he put his mind to, Joe excelled in campaigning. His wit and easy way around people made him endearing and the obvious choice.
When I was young, I found this competition to be a terrible thing, a destructive force working against our friendship. It brought me a lot of sorrow back in those days, but I've come to reevaluate it since I've grown up and become a man. The competition I felt with Joe has transformed into something positive and purposeful. In some ways, Joe is the source of my drive. He taught me what it was to work for what I want. He showed me how to imagine, to plan in detail, how to act in pursuit of my goals, and how to survive the inevitable hardships that follow the process of wanting.
My birthday party 1987.
I want many things from this life. I'm not afraid to admit that fact. I've already achieved a lot of things as a result of this wanting, this inner desire that drives me to push past my own status quo. For that, I am proud and grateful. I am proud to have been friends with Joe while he was alive. Yet I always return to the fact that I am grateful. Grateful to have known him. Grateful to have been a part of his life. Grateful that he was a part of mine. He is missed dearly by his family, his friends, his community.
He was one of a kind.
Photo taken at the Peterson's house in 1983
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